8 weeks...ugh

So the nausea has kicked in. I haven't thrown up yet which I guess is a good thing...or maybe it's not. I don't really feel too tired which is a plus but I am not really liking this queasy thing. I haven't been sick in awhile and sick especially in the stomach area so I forgot how crappy this feeling is. An upset tummy is no fun! And I'm not sure why they call it 'morning sickness' because that's a lie. They should call it uncontrollable queasiness that lasts all day every day that really has no remedy. Thankfully it hasn't really hindered work or anything. I'm acting somewhat normal but I am eating about every 2 hours which I find helps. Just something small because the empty stomach feeling is the worst when it's upset. The thing that really is starting to upset me though is my prenatal vitamins are making me want to gag. I don't think they make me feel more sick after I've swallowed them, just the thought of taking them makes me want to vomit all over the place. I can already feel my throat tighten just thinking about it. Another thing that makes me sad is that the usual healthy meals and snack that I used to enjoy have no appeal to me whatsoever...oatmeal, veggies....ugh I'm actually craving bad stuff like tacos from Jack in the box and pizza (ooh that sounds good right NOW). I always wished that I would crave fruits and veggies as a pregnant lady but I guess that's too much to ask. Another fun thing that I've noticed is that certain smells make me sick...like every time I go into the pantry I get an overwhelming nausea feeling. I've started to hold my breath now every time I go in there. Also the new dresser in our bedroom has a lacquer smell to it that is just so gross...also probably didn't help that I just stained our headboard so that's super gross too. I have to stop writing because I have now managed to make myself queasy thinking about all of the nasty smells around me.

7 weeks

So I'm 7 weeks this week and I don't really feel anything out of the ordinary aside from some mild sensitivity coming from my uterus...I'm sure this is all in my head though. No nausea or tiredness which is great. I did go to a seminar for work that had an afterward cocktail hour. I told people I wasn't drinking because I had a headlight out...which was true in actuality but I'm sure one glass of wine would have been ok. Regardless no suspicions were raised. I should probably say that we have decided to keep this a secret until later on in this trimester. I have read that it is sometimes wise to only tell a few close people in the very unfortunate case of a miscarriage which has a relatively higher than I'd like to think probability in the first trimester (10-15%). I have already squealed to my sister 3 days after the first positive pregnancy test. But that's all for me. Of course we would love to tell both our sets of parents but we feel that the leakage factor is very high in doing so. They will find out soon enough...and hopefully will be so excited that they won't even realize how mad they are that we've kept it from them.

1st doc appt

I scheduled the doc appt for the next earliest availability. Which happened to be just 4 days after I took the pregnancy test so we didn't have to wait too long. (side note: I took 2 other pregnancy tests over the weekend JUST to make sure that this wasn't all a big fluke...results: all positive). So we get into the office and I take their pregnancy test...which is just a pee test anyway by the way. I did have a slight suspicion that just my luck, theirs would come out negative. But I was wrong thank you Jesus I'm not crazy! So we go through the usual questions and by usual I mean all the first appointment questions I had researched on the Internet. What is your view on natural birth? Where do you deliver? Will you be the one to deliver the baby or someone else? Etc etc. Then we scheduled a sonogram to determine exactly how far along I was. I could have told them this because I did an ovulation test and it was positive on December 22nd. So that would put me at six weeks...which was technically 4 weeks from when I ovulated but for some reason the docs always tack on 2 weeks?? I don't really get that but anyway...

The next day was our sonogram appt. I was SUPER excited about confirming the fact that I had a little growing cluster of cells in my uterus. Since I was so early along, they had to do the big stick thing with the egg-like shaped thing on the end...let's just say it wasn't an outside sonogram on my belly...but there it was! A little flickering something. She said the flickering was the heartbeat and that it was at a normal rate for that time period. It was so super duper tiny but it was still there! We got a due date of September 14th. My sister's birthday is September 27th, she of course said it was a perfect month to be born.

Note: In the picture, baby is the little white speck on the top...then the embryo sack is the translucent circle.

It's positive!

So I decided to take a pregnancy test last Friday after work. We were about to go to Four Peaks Brewery and I had missed my period by a day. Normally this wouldn't be too much cause for concern but I felt like my period really shouldn't be late since the last 3 months had been six week long cycles. That's right, I was in the 50s as far as days go in between periods so I didn't really think that my body should be going much longer. What was the harm in testing anyway? It could either be positive and prevent me from doing something I regretted later (like drink a whole bunch of beer that night) or it could at least give me assurance that I wasn't positive so I could drink a whole bunch of beer that night...so I tested. PLUS SIGN....almost literally as soon as my pee soaked through the little window. I think I panicked a little because I put it down out of sight right away to wait for the whole three minutes like the box said to do...three minutes later I picked it up again...YES, it was positive! I even checked the box to make sure I was reading it right. Holy cow! I think I stared at it for a solid minute before coming to. I can't even remember what I was thinking about honestly...I'm sure it was along the lines of how our lives are going to change forever, is this really happening right now, etc. Then I hear the garage door open. OMG how am I going to tell him?? I take a few deep breaths to calm my heart beating that is now in my ears. I actually had thought about this scenario a few times before. How would I break the happy news? Would I leap out of the bathroom with a giant grin and the proof in my hand? Or maybe I would take a picture of the stick and message it to him with some clever saying like "daddy's eyes only"? I couldn't keep on wasting this time in the bathroom, I'm just going to play it by ear once I get out there. I take a deep breath and reach for the doorknob. Then I hear her....my mother-in-law...NOOO!! Now what am I going to do? I quickly shove the stick in my pocket and open the door. It was all the usual pleasantries in the kitchen..."how was your day? Fine. How was yours?" etc etc. I quickly snapped back to the task at hand primarily because of the severity of the news that I was afraid was going to burst out my mouth but also because I had a pee soaked stick in my pocket...which is gross. So I made my way upstairs. That's it, he's going to need to come up to change out of his work clothes and if I go up now he'll want to know what I'm doing. So I get upstairs to our bedroom and I wait...and wait...about 5 minutes later I finally hear him come up. My heart is beating in my ears again. He's talking about something, I have no idea what because I can't hear him. I can just hear my own voice in my head saying "SHUSSHH! I need to tell you that I'm pregnant!" So I hand over the stick. He looks at it with extreme caution with a sort of WTF face. Then he looks at me and says what does it mean? In a tone implying that he knows exactly what this means. Then he looks back at the stick, then looks at me...a small grin forming. So I say" well I wouldn't be showing you a test that didn't matter"....and then we both stare at it with amazed and is this for real faces for about a minute before someone speaks. That someone is our rational side. Ok now let's not get too excited yet...let's make an appt with the doc asap...let's wait to hear what they say... I think this talk was more for him, because I was already evolving into preggo mode.